Lucy and Ethel Walk to the Sonic for Happy Hour

[Written on February 7, 2015]

DB and I have missed five days of walking after work for various lame excuses. Today it was almost six, but she texted me and said “It’s .8 miles to Sonic. We should walk there for happy hour.”

I was too busy. I almost said no, but YOLO! And, off the two of us lumbered in search of 99 cent Route 44s…Lucy and Ethel who find it tiring to locate our tennis shoes and get them on. But, it was AWESOME, the sun in our eyes,the wind chapping our lips, and conversation to die for.

Lucy: My knees hurt.
Ethel: I’ve got the wrong !#!!$^ bra on. My back is hurting. Do you think people think we are homeless?
Lucy: What?? I don’t care if they do. Hey! Where did the d@mn sidewalk go? It just flippin’ ended. Walk single file or you are going to get run over!
Ethel: WTH? Are you my big sister?
Lucy: When we get to the cross over, cross over!
Ethel: Okay. Crap…I can’t tell where the road isn’t level…nearly busted my @$%$.
Lucy: CROSS! OVER! NOW!
Ethel: O.M.G. Look, Lucy, you get in front…the last order you gave me was to cross over at the CROSS OVER. We are nowhere NEAR the crossover.
Lucy: But, there’s a sidewalk over there.
Ethel: Oh…okay, then…let’s get over there before it disappears…what was I saying when you yelled at me to CROSS THE &#$%@ OVER here?
Lucy: I don’t know…OMG…now THIS sidewalk is ending.
Ethel: Okay, but it’s going to take me a minute to find the level part of the road again with these shades over my flipping reading glasses. I can’t see where to step up or step down. How far have we gone?
Lucy: We are almost to the end of the driveway.
Ethel: Whatever.

At the Sonic, we each grabbed a 30 lb. bucket of diet coke to carry back home. That brought its own special flavor of chatter, but I will save it for another chapter about our athletic lives.